Let Them Go To Get Them Back

Today we're going to be talking about, let them go to get them back. Does that make sense to you, Margaret?

Margaret (00:49):

In a weird kind of way. It really does in a weird kind of way.

Craig (00:54):

You know, Margaret, before you share what you have today, I wanted to say, people always ask us about the law of attraction and does the law of attraction work for dating. And for me, I don't know how you feel about this, but for me, it's almost the opposite of what people say the law of attraction is when it comes to re-attracting an ex. For me, it's almost like you don't manifest them by thinking about them. You kind of manifest them back by saying, that's it I'm done. I'm moving on with my life. And then they kind of sense it. I don't know how, I don't know why, you know,

Margaret (01:30):

So the law of attraction would say where your focus is, that's what you're going to get put out to the universities, what you're going to get. But I don't think it works here. I've never been a great believer, I must confess, in the laws of attraction. Now I do believe there is an unconscious mind and we can draw things or not draw things to ourselves without knowing it. But I don't know about the law of attraction. There are many people who are more familiar with it than I, yeah, but for me, in my experience with breakups, it's almost just seems like that letting go is when they start to somehow sense it or feel it.

Craig (02:09):

Absolutely. But you can't inauthentically do it. You can't fake it. You really have to process and deal and heal and grow. And when you really genuinely mean it, that's when they tend to come back, I call it a disturbance in the force. Yet the disturbance, a disturbance in the ether is something other people will say, and I've always called it the airwaves. Yeah. That's just my take on it. You guys can disagree if you want. That's totally understandable. But in my case, and just seeing breakups all the time, I just see it so often. It's just, it just blows me away. And even in my own life where I've got to places with certain people where I was okay with not being with them, it's when they wanted me. Of course.

Craig (03:00):

So, we're going to talk about how letting go can actually get someone back.

Margaret (03:06):

We're going to talk mostly about letting go because so many people struggle terribly with it. And I have two sets of thoughts on it today. Now this one is almost a guided imagery. It's a little out there for me, a little wifi. So I hope you'll bear with me, but the reason it caught my attention is because, believe it or not, it agrees with Freud. Now for its concept of attachment and grief, he saw grief as you know, the process of letting go of attachment. And he saw it in terms of energy as does this particular author. And when, if you look at it, it's the classic denial, anger

Craig (03:51):

Bargaining

Margaret (03:55):

Grief, and then finally acceptance. So when you get to acceptance, you have withdrawn your energy from the object, whether it's a loss of a partner or someone has passed, whatever. So he sees it as a slow process of taking your energy back. And this lady talks in terms of energy too. So let me tell you what she has to say.

Margaret (04:19):

How possibly do you let let go of someone who you really love? And she goes back to the beginning of the relationship and says that when you let someone into your heart, you create an energetic bond with them. In other words, there's an exchange of energy between the two of you. As your heart opens their energy mingles with yours until you are one big swirling ball of love energy. That's the fun part, right? You make your friends sick with all of the love. You're spewing. It's fun. It's awesome. You get closer still. And now your partner's energy is setting up residence in your heart. It's like you gave them a drawer in your dresser. I love that. Okay. It's like you gave the majority of dresser or space in your closet for their things. You're attached. Okay? What's actually happening, energetically is that you're building a cord of energy between the two of you.

Margaret (05:22):

You have cords of energy between you and all the people you let into your life. Friends, relatives, coworkers, etcetera. But the strongest cord is usually between you and your partner. It's built on love, experiences, shared dreams and future plans. Okay? So what happens when you break up energetically, the cord can rip and tear, a disruption occurs the love energy that used to flow back and forth between you is now poison, angry, upset, etcetera. And that cord continues to pump energy into you. Where once it was good, now, it doesn't feel good at all. When you're ready to let go of your ex energetically, there are ways you can do it and do it so you don't hurt so badly.

Craig (06:20):

Everybody's like, please help tell me how to do it.

Margaret (06:24):

Yeah. First you've got to gently lift the cord up and out of your energetic body and let it fall gently to the floor in peace, in love for your own good. And for the highest good to do this, repeat this mantra, or use it as an example and create your own.

Craig (06:44):

Okay? So she wants you to kind of visualize a mantra.

Margaret (06:48):

Visualize it while you say this mantra to yourself, I release your energy from mine. I send you peace, love and compassion. I appreciate the love we shared, but now it's time to let you go. I wish you well, then literally imagine yourself lifting the cord up out of your heart and let it walk to gently to the ground. This will release you from their energy. So it doesn't continue to negatively affect you. If your ex wants to keep pumping hatred or blame or anger through the court, it will no longer be anchored in you. And that's his or her choice to keep doing that if desire, but you've literally unplugged

Craig (07:34):

From that person. Okay. That's an interesting visualization. I just kind of imagined like a, like a power cord going into your heart. And you're just like, and then you're like thoughts down on the ground, you know? And just like, you know, and so if there's anger and hatred, it spews out, but you walk, you left the court and you walked away. Yeah.

Margaret (07:58):

There's no longer that conduit, that cord that connection. So I thought it was useful. You need, you may need to do this several times until you really feel released from your ex's energy.

Craig (08:09):

Yeah, for sure. I definitely think you'd have to do that several times.

Margaret (08:12):

Yeah. I'm sure you would. Most people try to rip the cord from their body, leaving pieces behind like angry shrapnel that continues to poison you over the years. It's far better to take the arrow out and clean the area without leaving any of the barbs behind. When you released the energetic could between you, you may feel like there's a gaping hole in your heart to close the wound, use this mantra. I am whole and complete within myself. I am worthy of being loved for who I truly am. I am always connected to the universe. I feel love around me. And remember that I am never truly alone. When you were saying this mantra, imagine a beautiful, pure white light coming into your body and filling you with love. And I like the image again, of a hole in your heart. I've had so many people literally say that to me. You know, since my partner is gone, I feel like I have a hole in my heart. That is how you feel. Yeah.

Craig (09:19):

Yeah. For me, I felt like a giant gaping hole in my chest. Yeah. But yeah, heart too. But too, it's like, yeah. In your chest, it really felt like it. Yeah. It's just unreal.

Margaret (09:34):

Anyway, I'm not particularly into guided imageries either. But I liked this one and I thought the theory was sound behind it. Yeah.

Craig (09:44):

Because you know, you've talked to me about Freud many times over the year and how he believed in energy. Okay.

Margaret (09:51):

Energy. his whole theory. The steam engine was a fairly new thing when Freud was coming up with his theory and much of it is based on energy and energy flow. Hmm. Yeah. There's a little tidbit of useless information for you, but I, I saw the parallel here. Yeah. Yeah.

Craig (10:10):

And I really do think that somehow letting someone go a sense, it, they actually feel it and you've seen it in your work. I've seen it in mine. It's just, yeah.

Margaret (10:23):

Yeah. And then, and only then might you have a chance of reconnecting in a different way. You have sort of cleaned out the bad stuff.

Craig (10:33):

Yeah. And if you're processing and dealing with it, then you really get to a good place where you can try and start something good again. Sometimes I think there are just things that we don't have explanations.

Margaret (10:45):

Absolutely. There are. And I think there are kinds of communication that we can't explain yet. Yeah. This lady's name, if you're interested, is Erin Pavlina, if you want to look her up on the computer,

Craig (11:02):

It was called how to energetically let of an ex.

Margaret (11:09):

Okay. That's my story.